Emotional Learning: What is to be Listened to

Pastel painting by Penina Horowitz

You know
sometimes we have these feelings,
"feelings" like in emotional stuff,
but really, all "feelings" have a feeling part in our body, too,
a physical component.

And maybe we can play with this:
if we "feel" the physical part of any given
"feeling"
does that feel like we are expanding
or
contracting?

So, say: you feel "happy?"
And the physical feeling is like wanting to
dance,
or jump up and fling your arms in the arm,
or reach out and embrace someone,
or
sing for joy.

All that "feels" expansive,
wouldn't you say?

And then, let's go the other way:
we feel worried and abandoned,
say,
and what goes on in us physically?
Maybe we crunch in on ourselves,
and breathe less,
maybe we tighten up our belly muscles
as if protecting (from ???),
and hunch in our shoulders,
almost as if we want to curl up in a little ball
and
escape the world.

And that doesn't sound expansive,
does it?

So,
let's play with this today:
phooey on all the positive and negative
emotion stuff,
let's just "feel" what our feelings are feeling,
and notice:
do I feel expansive
or
do I feel as if I'm contracting myself?

Now, there's an interesting thing to do with both
sets of physical manifestations of our
"feelings:
and that's this,
the good old fashioned
pay attention
wake up
be aware thing.

Feeling happy?
Great.
Notice the sensations in you
and since they are nice,
maybe act on them
or exaggerate them,
or at the least,
just enjoy them.

Feeling sad, mad, bad, afraid,
whatever?
Skip the words in your head
about all that
and just concentrate on the physical sensations.

Don't judge or condemn the sensations,
but pay them patient and kind attention
and see what happens
if you put attention/ awareness
on your
tension/ contraction.

Life can get interesting in the moment.

Life is almost always amazing and at least semi-miraculous
in the moment.

Give it a try,
and see what happens.

Thinking: Us vs. them

When we give someone we love one of our few last strawberries, or say even the last strawberry, we are happy.

Their pleasure in the strawberry is our pleasure.

But if someone we “don’t like,” or even someone we profess to “love,”
but with whom we have a kind of
competitive/ I’m not getting enough attitude,
“takes” one of our last strawberries,
we feel deprived.

Think about how this operates.

Think about what is the difference,
really,
between “us” and “them.”

Thinking: Us vs. them

When we give someone we love one of our few last strawberries, or say even the last strawberry, we are happy.

Their pleasure in the strawberry is our pleasure.

But if someone we “don’t like,” or even someone we profess to “love,”
but with whom we have a kind of
competitive/ I’m not getting enough attitude,
“takes” one of our last strawberries,
we feel deprived.

Think about how this operates.

Think about what is the difference,
really,
between “us” and “them.”

Moving when "tired"

This happens, doesn't it:
end of the day comes, and we just want to "flake out."

For me, it's lie on my back and read a novel.

For others TV, a DVD, a beer.

And there's always getting on the phone and jawing away.

So, what could mindfulness show us about this "tiredness" thing.

Well, for a start, we could feel and sense where specifically in our bodies
this
"tiredness' seems to be the strongest.

Right now for me, it's around my eyes and in the back of my neck.

And in the lungs, my lungs, having a bit of a trouble breathing.

So here we have three areas for me to move, and as I do,
let's see if we together can create an opening back to the joys
of
"just being alive," that is always the fruit and
the sign of being mindful.

Okay: tiredness always seems to come to the back of the neck.
And we are in the Feldy and Anat Baniel fields of learning and exploration,
which gives us the delightful option:
how to move easily and slowly and in a way that connects down deeper
into
ourself.

How about this?
Place your right hand over your head to loosely hold your left ear,
or something close to that.
And here, begin to rock side to side, so your elbow shifts where it is pointing upward
right and left.

Feel your neck move
and
your back
and
your ribs

and do please
allow one side of your pelvis to raise up
each time you bend to the side,
the hip raising Up
toward the shoulder that is moving DOWN

Just do this say seven times
count them
and feel sense notice search
enjoy a little bit different about each one.

Take an eyes closed rest.
Feel if anything has shift.

Now put the other hand, left,
over your head to the right ear, or thereabout.

Slowly shift back and forth right and left as before,
but just a few times.

Then, when you get to the right tip (right hip up, elbow as far to the right
as you and it can easily go), stay there, and rock forward and back a bit
on the left side of your pelvis, your left sit bone.

It is as if you are coming more forward with your elbow
as your belly comes in
and you shift farther back on the left sit bone
(Ishium)

Go slow. Go slowly.

As you do this, close your eyes, and feel your
ribs
and spine
and neck
and breathing.

Then side bend your elbow to your left
raising your left hip and
sitting on your right sit bone/ ishium.

From there fold and arch, feel your spine coming forward at the top and bottom with the elbow
forward part of this,
and feel your spine top and bottom coming toward each
other in the back
as you push out your belly and arch.

Do this with your eyes closed.

Rest.

See if you can put both hands slightly over your head toward the other ear and do
something like a hoola hoop
with your pelvis,
letting the elbows makes their own form of circle.

Go slow.
Go slowly.

Wanting what we "don't want"

Here's one way to go about things:

You beat your head against the wall
and "don't get"
what you
"want"
so you learn to
"stop wanting"

which could mean not reaching out and forward in
life
anymore

just hunker down
and what??
watch TV
complain
play scrabble
who knows




And then, here's another approach:

go for what you want
and if you get it

great

and if you don't get it

great

one: you learned something

two: you have your life and love and awareness
and gratitude no matter what

three: you could step back and learn
how to go about the game
again

four: you could relax and find another game

five: you could meditate on
nothing
and use that bliss
to realize that anything you do
can have the undercurrent

of now is great
and
the next
now is great
and

the next
now is great

and maybe you get to the "aim"
and maybe not,
or
maybe "not yet"
and all
along the way

now is great


good